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What is Bullying?

William DeMeo, PhD

May 4, 2020

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Question

What is bullying?

Answer

The definition that is most widely accepted is bullying is when someone repeatedly and on purpose says or does mean or hurtful things to another person who has a hard time defending himself or herself.

There are some very important connotations related to this definition. First, it is repeated. If a behavior occurs just once it is not considered bullying behavior. It has to be a behavior that is repeated. Second, the intent or the purpose is to be hurtful to somebody else. There needs to be intent and it needs to be associated with an aggressive act. Finally, the person who's being bullied has a hard time defending themselves, meaning that there is an imbalance of power.

Four Markers of Bullying

  • A form of aggressive behavior
  • Intent to harm
  • Repeated over time
  • Imbalance of power
 

In order to identify bullying behavior, there are four criteria. First, it's in the form of aggressive behavior. Second, the intent or purpose is to be hurtful or to create harm. Third, it needs to be repeated. Last, there has to be an imbalance of power. What do I mean by an imbalance of power? This could be numbers such as five young children to one or physical stature where a child is bigger and stronger than the other particular young child. It could also be status, such as a very popular child and a child who is not popular. There are a lot of different ways to describe the imbalance of power.

This Ask the Expert is an edited excerpt from the course, Bully Proofing Your Early Childhood Program, in partnership with Region 9 Head Start Association, by William DeMeo, PhD.


william demeo

William DeMeo, PhD

Dr. William DeMeo is a Developmental Psychologist who consults with an organization that serves over 1,000 daycare programs across the county. In addition, he has a private practice that specializes in serving children and families that other agencies are not able to serve in the Greater Cincinnati Area. William had coordinated the mental health services for Cincinnati Public Schools’ Early Childhood Program for the past 25 years. A former teacher, he has taught at all levels, from elementary through the university. Finally, William is a National Certified Olweus Trainer, National Association of School Psychologist Approved Provider and a National Consultant for the Office of Juvenile Justice Delinquency Prevention.

William has presented workshops and symposia at the national meetings for early childhood professionals at the National Head Start Association (NHS), National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC), Society for Developmental Education (SDE) and the Association for Childhood Education International (ACEI). In addition, he has also presented numerous workshops for administrators, mental health professionals and educators at the National Association of School Psychologists (NASP), Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development (ASCD), National Association of Elementary School Principals (NAESP), Council for Exceptional Children (CEC), National Title I Conference, American Montessori Society (AMS), Association of Middle Level Education (AMLE),​​Global Summit on Childhood, Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention (OJJDP) and International Behavioral Institute for Children and Adolescents.

William continues to be one of the most sought after national and international trainers for educators in the areas of challenging behavior, mental health and brain-based learning, utilizing his extensive experience to present practical and entertaining workshops. He has authored several books, including his latest publications; ​Managing the Angry and Aggressive Child (1999), ​Brain-Based Learning: How Does the Brain Really Learn! (2000), ​The Educator’s Survival Guide for Preventing Burnout! (2003), ​Reading with the Brain in Mind! (2003), Discipline with the Brain in Mind! ​(2006), ​The Bullying Student (​2007) and ​Sensory Integration Dysfunction ​(2010), When Nothing Else Works: What Early Childhood Professionals Can Do to Reduce Challenging Behaviors (2013).


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