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What are Warning Signs of Bullying in Toddlers and Preschoolers?

William DeMeo, PhD

June 22, 2020

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Question

What are warning signs of bullying in toddlers and preschoolers?

Answer

  • Has many temper tantrums in a single day, or several lasting more than 15 minutes, and often cannot be calmed by parents, family members, or other caregivers
  • Has many aggressive outbursts, often for no reason
  • Is extremely active, impulsive, and fearless
  • Consistently refuses to follow directions and listen to adults
  • Does not seem attached to parents
  • Frequently watches violence on television, engages in play that has violent themes, or is cruel toward other children

There are some warning signs to be aware of in young children who may have been bullied or who might be the bully. It's important to remember that these particular warning signs could be an indication of other things, such as trauma or physical or sexual abuse. We, as early childhood professionals, need to be detectives and investigators to determine what is the root cause of that particular behavior.

One behavior you might see is a temper tantrum or many temper tantrums in the course of a day. These temper tantrums might last more than 15 minutes and even the caregiver, yourself, or parents are not able to calm the child. The child may have many aggressive outbursts for no apparent reason. The child might fly off the handle all of a sudden and have explosive behavior for no apparent reason. The child can be extremely active, impulsive, and fearless, more than the other young children within your program.

The next three are more indicators of a child who might actually engage in bullying behavior. The child consistently refuses to follow directions and listen to adults. The child does not seem to be attached to his or her parents, frequently watches violence on television, and/or engages in play that has violent themes or is cruel towards other children. Precursors to bullying behavior are very easy to identify and observe in our early childhood programs, especially during dramatic playtime and how the child associates with materials and others.

This Ask the Expert is an edited excerpt from the course, Bully Proofing Your Early Childhood Program, in partnership with Region 9 Head Start Association, by William DeMeo, PhD.


william demeo

William DeMeo, PhD

Dr. William DeMeo is a Developmental Psychologist who consults with an organization that serves over 1,000 daycare programs across the county. In addition, he has a private practice that specializes in serving children and families that other agencies are not able to serve in the Greater Cincinnati Area. William had coordinated the mental health services for Cincinnati Public Schools’ Early Childhood Program for the past 25 years. A former teacher, he has taught at all levels, from elementary through the university. Finally, William is a National Certified Olweus Trainer, National Association of School Psychologist Approved Provider and a National Consultant for the Office of Juvenile Justice Delinquency Prevention.

William has presented workshops and symposia at the national meetings for early childhood professionals at the National Head Start Association (NHS), National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC), Society for Developmental Education (SDE) and the Association for Childhood Education International (ACEI). In addition, he has also presented numerous workshops for administrators, mental health professionals and educators at the National Association of School Psychologists (NASP), Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development (ASCD), National Association of Elementary School Principals (NAESP), Council for Exceptional Children (CEC), National Title I Conference, American Montessori Society (AMS), Association of Middle Level Education (AMLE),​​Global Summit on Childhood, Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention (OJJDP) and International Behavioral Institute for Children and Adolescents.

William continues to be one of the most sought after national and international trainers for educators in the areas of challenging behavior, mental health and brain-based learning, utilizing his extensive experience to present practical and entertaining workshops. He has authored several books, including his latest publications; ​Managing the Angry and Aggressive Child (1999), ​Brain-Based Learning: How Does the Brain Really Learn! (2000), ​The Educator’s Survival Guide for Preventing Burnout! (2003), ​Reading with the Brain in Mind! (2003), Discipline with the Brain in Mind! ​(2006), ​The Bullying Student (​2007) and ​Sensory Integration Dysfunction ​(2010), When Nothing Else Works: What Early Childhood Professionals Can Do to Reduce Challenging Behaviors (2013).


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