Question
How are children impacted by high-conflict Divorces/Separations?
Answer
High-conflict divorces/separations impact parent-child relationships and often arise when parents struggle to distinguish their child's needs from their own emotional distress and anger. This inability to protect the child from parental conflict can be conscious or unconscious but invariably increases the level of conflict within the family. Such families frequently engage in litigation over various issues and often seek mental health services. However, rather than addressing their own conflict, parents may focus on their child's distress, akin to bailing water from a boat without repairing the hole.
Children from high-conflict homes suffer significantly, exhibiting higher rates of externalizing behaviors such as aggression, conduct problems, and substance abuse. These children also face academic difficulties, earlier onset of sexual activity, and erratic behavior. Internalizing behaviors such as depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and poor interpersonal skills are also common. Additionally, these children may experience poor nutrition and reduced physical activity. Unlike families where conflict diminishes over time, children in high-conflict environments do not have the opportunity to heal and recover, leading to prolonged distress.
Parental alienation is another significant issue in high-conflict families, where one parent believes the other is turning the child against them. This is a common concern but challenging to prove, as it often stems from the high-conflict nature of the family. Clinicians face difficulties in addressing parental alienation due to its complex, he-said-she-said nature, making it a contentious and delicate issue within both therapeutic and legal settings.
This Ask the Expert is an edited excerpt from the webinar, Clinical Interventions with Children in Divorce/Separation Scenarios, presented by Karalynn Royster, PsyD
